PSA: Don’t Poop In Rochester’s Public Pools This Summer
Today I received an e-mail that I wanted to pass on to you involving public swimming pools in the Med City. This came from the Olmsted County Public Health Services Department, and it’s about poop, so I obviously read the entire thing.
Pools that are added with chlorine tend to kill a lot of germs, with the exception of one germ known as Cryptosporidium, a.k.a. "Crypto," because I don't want to type that entire word again. Here’s the deal with Crypto – it’s caused by poop. Let’s talk about poop.
Every year, there are various outbreaks of Crypto in Minnesota, which can cause a lot of public pools to shut down. It can also lead to you getting sick. No one wants that, especially on a hot summer day. Those are rare and sacred things, so here’s how keeping your butt under control can save our pools and your health:
- Don’t Poop In The Pool
I feel like this is one thing in life that should go without saying, but I’m guessing I’d probably be surprised. Please don’t poop in a public swimming pool. That’s weird, man. The bathroom is right there! Try not to drop a candy bar in the pool, either.
- Also, Don’t Pee In The Pool
- Don’t Swim If You’ve Recently Had Diarrhea
The only time it’s acceptable for you to have diarrhea and be in a public swimming pool is if you inform every single person in the pool area that you have diarrhea. And please, I beg of you, film their reactions. I would watch that video.
- Wash Your Butt Before You Get In The Water
Here’s a great opportunity to take your Soap Game up a notch. You can go with traditional Irish Spring, or you can have your butt scrubbed clean with Fresh Lilac or Grapefruit Pomegranate Exfoliating Scrub. There are a lot of soaps, is what I’m saying. Your butt, your public swimming pool, and society will thank you.
- Take Kids On Bathroom Breaks Every 30 Minutes
No matter their age, I highly recommend loudly yelling out to your child, “Honey, it’s time for you to go potty-wotty so you don’t go poopsy-whoopsy in the pool!” Again, do this every thirty minutes. For safety.
- Don’t Swallow Pool Water
Source: Olmsted County Public Health Services