Ladies, if you're looking for a man to bring home for the holidays and really want to upset your parents, THIS guy has you covered. A 28-year-old guy in Tennessee posted a Craigslist ad offering to accompany any woman to her families Thanksgiving festivities and pretend to be her degenerate boyfriend. The ad says:

"It's Thanksgiving. Want to skip that long, insulting conversation about how you're still single? About how your parents really want more grandchildren? Well, look no further!
I am a 28 year old felon with no high school degree, and a dirty old van one year younger than me painted like Eddie Van Halen's guitar. I can play anywhere between the ages of 20 and 29 depending on if i shave. I'm a line cook and work late nights at a bar. If you'd like to have me as your stictly platonic date for Thanksgiving, but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, to torment your family, I'm game.
I can do these things, at your request:
* Openly hit on other female guests while you act like you don't notice.
* Start instigative discussions about politics and/or religion.
* Propose to you in front of everyone.
* Pretend to be really drunk as the evening goes on (Sorry, i don't drink, but i used to. A lot. Too much in fact. I know the drill).
* Start an actual, physical fight with a family member, either inside or on the front lawn for all the neighbors to see.

 

I require no pay but the free meal I will receive as a guest!"

Here's the full ad, if you're interested. He's not asking much, ladies. Have a heart!

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